Life is full of stepping stones. They help and hinder you. The choices you make help to predict how you cope with these obstacles. Do you pick them up and throw them away or simply clamber across them? Do you ever look back and see the small pebbles that once felt like boulders in clay? Sometimes you get caught up in the rush. The surf carries you along and you forget.
I have often found that it only takes a name or a touch to take you back to the emotion that lies buried in your chest. Alive and pumping, it crashes over you in a storm. I find these moments vital. They refocus and regenerate my youth and awake my soul. Significance is not clouded any more. It does not lay hidden.
Who do you live for? Who do you fight for? Some people, like me, believe that they do things for themselves because ultimately, in life, you can only depend on one's self. Others do things for their parents/siblings. They seek pride and need. These are the people who ask, "Isn't it fantastic? Aren't you proud?". I have often wished I'd told them before they'd had to ask. I guess it does not really matter which camp you inhabit. Although throughout my analysis of human life, I have determined that people are usually one or the other. I'm not saying that people cannot have a little of the other too, but, predominantly, you're either doing it for yourself or you're doing it for someone else. As life goes on, I think we reach several stages where we are forced to question which camp we inhabit in order to make the choices that determine our path. A few weeks ago someone mentioned a name to me and in that moment I questioned why I had chosen this particular stone. On reflection, I merely decided that it was simply a glimpse of a star that helped to guide my feet it did not, necessarily, place them.
My move to Exeter has been one of the biggest challenges of my life so far. And yet, despite getting thrown with the wind, I have regained my footing. I am simply putting one foot in front of the other. I carve my destiny out the hewn rock in the hope that my path will be steady for a while at least.
